1 reason Leviticus is not a good book to read while you fast

January 6, 2012 — Leave a comment


This generally dull book is brought to a boil by fasting. Most people generally speed read through all the sacrifices and offerings: when you’re hungry – things change a bit.

I can read about bread and bullocks and pause and stare at the wall for a good 20 minutes.

Fat. Fat? Need I say anymore?

Anything baken in a frying pan makes my face twitch – ever so slightly.

The actual ceremony of flaying and dividing seems like one of the greatest jobs a priest could ever have.

Fine flour. Honey. Salt. Oil. I guarantee my wife could work with that and produce magic. Believe me, it would be unleavened bread: I wouldn’t give it time to rise before devouring.

I can get on board with separating the kidney and caul. Why waste any food at all?

I think it’s a crying shame that good meat is being burned on the altar. Take that shoulder roast off while it’s medium rare.

Heaving food into the air just seems like a waste.

7 feasts? Is it feasting that produces holiness and not fasting?

Leviticus is not a good book to read while you fast.

Disclaimer: this post was satirical and not spiritual.