Everybody needs a friend they can talk to about their issues and struggles. This relationship will save you before you make a mistake in life that you regret.
We’ve all heard that – few have done it. Even fewer have done it correctly. Sure we may have asked somebody to be our guy, but that doesn’t mean we ever called him when our foot nigh well slipped.
Here are a few reasons why it hasn’t worked:
- You are in a church culture that rewards honesty with public hangings. Therefore, you are reluctant to ever bare your soul to another human.
- The person you asked has the power to fire you. You will never be honest about failings to somebody that has the authority to make a decision that will affect your employment.
- You signed somebody up because you heard it was a good idea, and not because you wanted this to actually benefit your walk with God. This relationship is put on the backburner with the other good things you’ve never implemented.
- Your relationship didn’t include a confidentiality clause. In fear that this person might come clean and call your wife with all the details, you decide to open up about a few things but not everything.
- Your friend is an enabler. When you confess your issues they don’t speak the truth in love. When the conversation is over you feel like you have permission to continue in sin because you haven’t been provoked to good works.
- You enlisted your pastor as your guy. This generally doesn’t work well. However, you do end up giving the pastor a lot of direction for his next sermon.
- The person you chose has also been chosen by 5 others. Emotionally he doesn’t have the energy to give all 6 of you good advice and counsel. So they listen but don’t hear you.
- You don’t talk to your accountability partner enough. If you don’t do this monthly, you aren’t talking enough.
- Perhaps your person is under you in authority. In fear of losing respect in their eyes you silently think they can’t handle the truth.
- You lie or use semantics. This opposes the reasons for having accountability in the first place.
- Expectations aren’t clear. They don’t know what you want from them, and either do you.